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This has been one of the roughest weeks of my life, I have been extremely honest, and that part feels good, but I haven't been honest with my feelings in a long time so when I let out the honesty, its causing big waves. I need a hug and a should/arm massage - and that's extremely honest!
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Sacramento
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Re: Being completely honest ...
Tue, September 1, 2009 - 12:15 AMMaybe you can build from this experience and keep the honesty going. Most importantly being honets with yourself. That way there will be just a steady flow without the dramatic interludes. Good luck. -
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Re: Being completely honest ...
Tue, September 1, 2009 - 5:27 AMI am a work in progress when it comes to really being completely honest with myself....being who I really am deep down inside and expressing that openly. I think it stems from my very conservative christian upbringing. If I were to be completely honest with many of my family and longtime friends....it would cause a tidal wave, and maybe a few broken hearts. I'm not sure I can do that. -
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Re: Being completely honest ...
Tue, September 1, 2009 - 6:33 AMBeing completely honest with oneself and others is seldom a smooth trip. Your feelings and those around you at times will get hurt. That is part of the price you pay. I have found over time the hurt is far less then when one trades in deception and are found out. I am convinced that lying and deception is based on fear, fear that you might look bad, others may view us poorly.
I makes me wonder if the lying and hypocrisy that has becomes so apparent amongst conservatives and Christians is based on that fear and if perhaps it has become somehow ingrained in that culture.
JSin
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Re: Being completely honest ...
Wed, September 16, 2009 - 2:53 AMI wonder -
I think I'm still working on it - sometimes I believe some story I come up with - but when I'm honest with myself - I get it (does that make sense?)
also thought - if "honesty's the best policy" does that mean that "Liars don't have one (policy)?" just a thought. :)
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Re: Being completely honest ...
Tue, September 1, 2009 - 8:10 AMIt can be rough to be honest both with yourself and with others but the burden of dishonesty can be quite heavy. It can be such a relief to finally be honest and not be weighed down anymore by all the little (and big) moments of dis-honesty that can build up if you let them. Good for you for not being afraid to cause the waves. -
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Re: Being completely honest ...
Wed, September 30, 2009 - 1:09 AMcause the waves - I like that - it's what brings people together for better understanding and connection - through taking the risk of honesty - it's stronger than the house of cards that lies build - sometimes, I really wish I had this in other people - and it hurts when you realize - to believe that and not have it - is living a lie in itself - worse than being down, sad, disappointed. it's almost like - being betrayed but worse - broken hearted? perhaps.
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Re: Being completely honest ...
Tue, September 1, 2009 - 6:17 PM<I need a hug and a should/arm massage >
((((((((((BZ))))))))))))
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Re: Being completely honest ...
Fri, September 11, 2009 - 10:59 AMGOD - I heard ya on that one -
whenever I expose my love interest - she gets mad and defensive and I never know what to do about it - especially after allowing myself to be vulnerable - then I feel like shit for being raw - then made to feel bad about how I feel.
trying to find a way to have her not block me on Face Book either - we still hang out and have sex but don't know why she won't allow me to chat again and be part of her FB life. - feels like subterfuge and I don't know what to do - too many secrets and not being up front with whatever is "really" going on with her.
*sigh* -
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Re: Being completely honest ...
Sat, September 12, 2009 - 11:45 AMHmm, trying to figure out what it is that would force her to block you. Makes me think perhaps you have engaged in a bit of stalkeresque behavior. Just my take.
If that is not the case more likely she is up to something she does not wish to share with you regardless this does not sound particularly healthy
JSin
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Re: Being completely honest ...
Sun, September 13, 2009 - 11:49 AM>>trying to find a way to have her not block me on Face Book either - we still hang out and have sex but don't know why she won't allow me to chat again and be part of her FB life. - feels like subterfuge and I don't know what to do - too many secrets and not being up front with whatever is "really" going on with her. <<
and this is attractive to you because....?
and this is something you want to invest yourself in because...?
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Re: Being completely honest ...
Sun, September 13, 2009 - 12:45 PM<<whatever is "really" going on with her>>
Facebook is not the place to find out what is really going on with her.
If you are actually still close, and she feels comfortable confiding in you, you should already know what's going on in her life. I'm guessing that's not the case, however. Catch a hint.
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Re: Being completely honest ...
Mon, September 14, 2009 - 12:11 AMRona, you need maybe to think about what exactly you are getting out of this sort of behavior, and whether its healthy for you or not
Just a thought. -
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Re: Being completely honest ...
Wed, September 16, 2009 - 2:49 AMthanks for all your input - it's funny (when I'm stuck - damn, I get stuck)
you're right - is it, or isn't it = healthy? sometimes I know it's not - and other times - it's great. (life - right?)
honestly - we'd get mad at each other and delete, block, etc...here and on FB - back and forth. probably not the only ones - so now - it's just easier (I guess for her) to keep it the way it is (chatting on yahoo and leaving the others out of it)
going with the flow - and thanks to all for your input. Tribe let's us be - and I love it here.
much love
~R
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